Adulting: Where to Start?!
We finish college, move away from a school we love and friends who have been by our side -- literally by our side and sometimes even in the bed next to ours -- for four years, and move into the next phase of our lives: “adulting.” The expectation seems to be that some sort of magic will occur at graduation, and with the snap of a finger we will be living out our “Bold Type” dreams, where we are living in the big city, with the best friends, roommates, jobs, and relationships. That’s real-life, right? Well, not quite! Turns out adulting is hard and messy and not at all like TV, AND, it can also be a major turning point with endless possibilities.
With big adulting, comes big changes.
Changes to our social life, dating, jobs, our geographical locations, and the independence we have always wanted. We can stay up as late as we want and go out every day of the week. But wait a minute, when do we do our laundry? Workout? Go to the grocery store? Actually, make friends in the big new city we moved to? The hard truth is, it is unfortunately not magic, but a lot of effort and time is needed to take these steps!
We are on our own time now, and sometimes that means no set schedule or structure. But have no fear, you are not alone. Whether it appears this way on the outside, every young adult is going through the same transitions and growing pains as you. Here are some tips to help you manage your time, do the things you want to do and somehow still take care of yourself in the process:
Make (manageable) to-do lists!
Write down what you want to accomplish each day and for that day only. Whether it is work or personal tasks, such as folding your clothes and putting them away (or let’s be real, sometimes that is a two-day event), write it down, cross it off and get it done!
Do something outside of your comfort zone!
If you just moved to a new place and are looking to meet people, join a workout class, a club or attend a local event. Do something that gets you out of your apartment and out of your comfort zone. The reality is… you’ve probably never made a new friend sitting on the couch and you’re not going to start now!
Take the pressure off!
There is no set timeline or order in which young adults are supposed to do things. It may seem like your peers have it all figured out, but take it from a therapist -- that is just not the case! Remind yourself that everyone is at a different stage and frankly, just trying to get by one step at a time, just like you!
Take some time for yourself!
We all know the importance of self-care, and yet, it’s so easy to look right past it. Self-care can look different for every person, whether it’s going for a run, eating your favorite foods, getting into bed early with a good book, or binging TV all day on a Saturday. However you like to relax and recharge, carve out the time to do it!
We will all have successes and failures, and those failures will pave the way for growth and new opportunities.
So let go of the pressure, find time for yourself, and remember that everyone is figuring it out one step at a time!
By Jillian Meinhardt, LMSW, LGSW
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Moving into adulthood can bring up past trauma and current anxiety, and our therapists get that. So, we offer a multitude of services to support you. Our individual services include therapy for self-esteem, support for relationship challenges, and exploring identities as well as executive function support. We also offer couples therapy for those that are looking to grow in their relationships. We would love to chat with you today about the ways we can support your growth at our counseling practice serving the Washington, DC area!